Goodbye Complacency, Hello Vulnerability

After leaving Charleston, South Carolina with hesitation and uncertainty, here I stood. I took a deep breath as I disembarked from the plane and walked into the JFK terminal of my final check point before I leave The United States. I’ve always dreamed of coming to New York, but not like this. Not during my final goodbye of familiarity.

Without ease, I sat down on the ground, double checking my documents, calling my banks, wondering if I had enough US Dollars on me (should I take out more?), questioning if I should leave as I eat my donut.

What if this is a mistake? Shouldn’t I just stay and focus on my career? I could always travel later couldn’t I? I’m going to miss my friends, my family, my dog, my boyfriend…I shouldn’t leave them.

Knock it off Steph. What if you regret it even more? Maybe you should go and find out instead of never knowing. You have to go, so put a smile on your face, get up and take on the world.

“All passengers headed to…”

I stood up and tried to listen to the announcement, but I got distracted by the clusters of people surrounding me, all speaking different languages. “Goodbye American English, goodbye to understanding what anyone is talking about, goodbye communication, goodbye complacency.”

“Miss are you in line?”

I stared blankly. With a smile and worry in my eyes. “Oh yes. Sorry.” I gathered myself together, struggling with my backpack, snacks, and travel documents. I handed the lady my passport and my one way ticket to Reykjavík, Iceland. Out through the door and finally, I was on the plane that would change my life forever.